Remembering Irene McHenry

Irene McHenry – A Circle of Love

Irene Elizabeth McHenry was born January 24, 1946, and raised in York County, Pennsylvania. She was the daughter of Ira McHenry and Lois (Fine) McHenry, both of Benton, Pennsylvania. Irene passed away peacefully at home on March 11, 2026, after a year-long battle with liver cancer.

Throughout Irene’s entire life, she loved to visit Benton on weekends and to summer in that region of central Pennsylvania where her parents were born and her extended family members had lived over the past three centuries. From her earliest and frequent visits back to Benton, with its well-kept farms, stunning hemlock stands, springtime creeks freighted with fish, and winter valleys covered in mounds of crystal perfection, Irene evolved a deeply personal and spiritual sense of “the beauty in the world.” That sense would later manifest itself as a distinct throughline in Irene’s world view, especially in her lifelong achievement and innovation in education. Irene believed to her core that looking for the beauty in all things can make possible the impossible, thereby revealing the beauty and embracing diversity in the world.

After college, Irene moved to Columbia County and later to Philadelphia, where she built a life rooted in family and community while raising her son, Michael Koehler. After her marriage to Randy Granger, her family expanded to include his three children, Fletcher, Gordon, and Willa. She delighted in having Michael and his family living only 1.2 miles away and her best friend of forty years, Beulah Trey and her family, within just a few blocks. She welcomed all into the Mt. Airy community that she loved for over four decades.

Irene earned a B.A. from Susquehanna University, an M.A. from Bucknell University, and a Ph.D. from Fielding Graduate University. Under Irene’s pioneering leadership as Executive Director of the Friends Council on Education from 2001-2014, the Friends network of schools increased in vitality and interconnectedness as a national and international educational community. Irene’s core belief from her youth to seek “the beauty in the world” helped to inform her vision in creating legacy programs such as the Leadership Institute in Friends Schools, the SPARC (Spirited Practice and Renewed Courage) program, and numerous peer networks. For ten years after her retirement, Irene remained connected with the Friends Council through mentorship, leadership, and consulting activities. She loved above all leading the Quaker Pilgrimage to the Lake District in England and carried on making that joyous journey seven times, for the last time in 2024.

Prior to her service at Friends Council, Irene was the founding head of Delaware Valley Friends School, co-founder of Greenwood Friends School, and a founding faculty member of Fielding Graduate University’s doctoral program in Educational Leadership and Change. Irene co-authored multiple books, including Readings on Quaker Pedagogy (2004); A Governance Handbook for Friends Schools (2010); Tuning In: Mindfulness in Teaching and Learning (2010); The Autism Playbook for Teens: Imagination-Based Mindfulness Activities to Calm Yourself, Build Independence, and Connect with Others (2014); and Leading in the Light: Celebrating 325 Years of Quaker Education in America (2014). In addition, she regularly contributed to educational and psychological publications. Irene served on the boards of Haverford College, the Systems-Centered Training & Research Institute, the Council for American Private Education, the Mindfulness in Education Network, and Vector Group Consulting.

Irene lived a deeply spiritual life and integrated many different faith traditions into her religious practices. Meditation practice guided Irene’s daily life, as did Quakerism and her love of nature (first learned from her father). In recent years, Irene converted to Judaism. At the time of her death, she remained an active participant in Chestnut Hill Friends Meeting and a member of her beloved Germantown Jewish Center.

Irene lived a full life, placing professional accomplishment and relational integrity equally together on the very top shelf of her values. What made Irene’s life so special to so many was the high value she placed on learning from anyone and everyone. She especially cherished her time with children (and adults who possessed a childlike playfulness). She found immense joy in the close relationships she shared with her grandchildren, Stella and Charles Koehler, treasuring the time they spent together in her Mt. Airy home. She was deeply grateful that they lived nearby, allowing for frequent visits, spontaneous everyday moments, and the beloved tradition of “Grandma Reenie Camp,” which brought her great happiness and lasting memories for all.

Irene loved returning to Benton to visit her extended family whenever she could and welcoming her children back home at any opportunity for a visit. Irene never went to Benton without challenging her 98-year-old Aunt Jesse in a game (or three) of Scrabble. Irene discovered the importance of community within her family during her youth, and sharing this lesson became one of her most cherished Gifts to everyone who knew her. Irene is survived by her loving husband, Randy Granger; her brother, John McHenry; her son, Michael Koehler and his wife, Lauren McGuire, their children, Stella and Charles Koehler; and her stepchildren, Willa Granger and her fiancé, Zak Gordon; Gordon Granger and his wife, Kristi Wood; Fletcher Granger and his wife, Lauren Granger, their son, Brayden Granger; and her beloved “Royal” corgi, Bryn.

Friends Council is grateful for the life and witness of Irene McHenry. Her quiet strength and deep wisdom radiated warmth and caring with every interaction. She moved through the world attentive to the Light in each of us. Whether she was teaching in a classroom, guiding a young professional, or holding a room full of seasoned colleagues in gentle, steady care, she saw the beauty as well as the opportunity to seek justice. Her way of being invited us to slow down, to listen more deeply, and to meet one another with love.

We are grateful for the ways that Irene touched our lives, both personally and professionally. Many of you met Irene early in your journey, perhaps still finding your footing. She became a mentor whose insights and encouragement endured. When Irene looked at someone, she truly sawthat person—their goodness, their gifts, their potential—even parts that person had not yet recognized in themselves. Through countless small moments of coaching, listening, and calm challenge, she awakened in people a deeper sense of purpose. And in the spaces that she created for groups—cohorts, gatherings, circles of learning—she fostered communities where people both supported and stretched one another.

We are grateful for Irene’s commitment to Friends Council on Education, which she guided for more than 20 years with clarity, intensity, and devotion. Her legacy includes visible milestones such as the founding of the Leadership Institute, as well as less visible relationships and mutual care that she cultivated and nurtured among us. No matter her title or position—teacher, psychologist, founder, head of school, executive director—she was always, at heart, a teacher. She taught us to live with intention and to meet each person with the same compassion and curiosity she offered so freely. For her spirit, her life, and her leadership, we give thanks to Irene McHenry.